The definitive guide to the G-spot
|How to find it
The G-spot is actually the urethral sponge, a cushion of spongy tissue that is rich in blood vessels and has glands producing fluids. The sponge is wrapped like insulation around the urethra, which is a 1.5 to 2-inch-long tube through which urine is passed.
The sponge contains many nerve endings and so for many women, it is an erogenous zone.
When a woman is aroused, blood flows into the urethral sponge and its glands fill with fluid, causing the sponge to swell and become firmer. This is why the G-spot is easier to find when a woman is aroused. The G-spot can be felt as a raised area – either an oval shape or a ridge – from the front wall of the vagina (on the belly button side) about one third to one half of the way in the vagina, just above the pubic bone. Some experts consider the entire urethral sponge to be the G-spot.
Female genital anatomy [click here to enlarge]
The G-spot is not in the vagina
The reason that many women battle to find this supposed door to nirvana is that the urethral sponge is not actually inside the vagina but lies outside, close to the wall of the vagina, and can be felt through rather than inside it. (Similarly, the male prostate gland can be stimulated through the front wall of the rectum and is a source of great pleasure for men, leading to what is often described as a particularly deep orgasm.)
Stimulation of the urethral sponge – in fact, stimulation of the entire front wall of the vagina – is highly pleasurable for most women. The first third of the vagina is the most sensitive as it contains most of the nerve endings, and hence it is the source of great pleasure. Yet whether or not an orgasm can be brought on simply by locating the urethral sponge and pushing it like some magical ‘button’ is a contentious point. How each woman reacts to stimulation of the sponge may vary, with some enjoying the sensation but not necessarily reaching an orgasm.
The urethral sponge was identified as the source of female erotic pleasure by gynaecologist Ernst Grafenberg in the 1940s and 1950s, and the name ‘G-spot’ was coined in his honour in 1982.
How to stimulate the G-spot
For some women, stimulation of the G-spot is simply too intense, while others find it annoying. Or it may feel responsive only at certain stages of the monthly cycle. Be forewarned – once you’ve located yours, there’s no orgasmic guarantee. We are all unique in the way we experience sexual intimacy and pleasure, so there is no point in creating sexual ‘goal posts’, especially concerning the G-spot. It’s perfectly okay to find it only mildly pleasurable – other types of stimulation may be more in tune with your sexual being. But by all means, give it a good go.
The best G-spot positions
A curved finger or vibrator is more likely to hit the spot than a penis – unless you try a G-spot friendly sex position such as woman on top, penetration from behind while lying on your stomach or side, squatting, or any comfortable position that allows easy access to the front wall of your vagina. Aim for shallow penetration as the G-spot is in the outer third of the vagina, which means that deep penetration will miss it completely.
If you’re going solo, there are various positions that make it easier: lie on your back with your knees pulled up and a pillow under your bum to tilt it; lie on your stomach; sit in a squatting position; or squat on all fours.
How to have a G-spot orgasm
The following are some good pointers:
- Stimulating the G-spot involves pressing on the urethra, which means you will probably feel like you need to urinate. Empty your bladder before you begin, so you know a full bladder is not the issue.
- It is best to be aroused before attempting to locate the spongy area, as it is easier to feel when the erectile tissue is engorged with blood. When you feel ready, begin exploring the front vaginal wall with one or two crooked fingers.
- Ensure fingers are clean and nails trimmed short and straight before inserting. The middle finger is often the best in terms of its length and dexterity.
- Alternatively – and for added sensation – pop a finger cot (used to clean babies’ teeth) or vibrating finger sleeve on your finger.
- Curved vibrators and dildos made especially for G-spot massaging may be helpful as they can reach further than a finger and might be easier to use.
- If extra lubrication is needed, don’t be shy to use a good water-based, glycerin-free lube.
- Insert the finger about two inches into the vagina and angle it towards the front wall (belly button side). Just after the pubic bone is a slightly protruding area that feels different. Most of the vaginal wall feels smooth but this spot will feel rougher and possibly stick out like a bit of a ridge.
- If you can’t feel a distinctly different area, try to locate it by sensation instead, using a massaging action to find what feels pleasurable.
- Wriggle your finger using a ‘come hither’ motion or pushing on it directly and consistently. Firm pressure is needed to feel through the wall – the G-spot doesn’t respond well to light pressure.
- Use different pressures and motions, and try different types of stimulation such as massaging and vibrating, to see what feels the most pleasurable.
- When the area is first stimulated, this may cause a sensation of needing to urinate, but after 10 seconds or so the feeling should pass.
- It may take ongoing stimulation to have an effect but patience is usually well rewarded. Ejaculation of a clear fluid often accompanies G-spot stimulation – either right before or during an orgasm – and the extent of this may vary from squirting across the room to a few drops of fluid on the sheet. (What is female ejaculation?)
- Some women need a feeling of fullness to even notice their G-spot, which is where the practice of fisting – inserting a hand into the vagina and easing it into a fist – comes in.
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