If you want to learn, read up on the issue or discuss it with others to learn from their experiences and swop tips. Bear in mind, though, that people are individuals and what one person loves when receiving fellatio could actually be a huge turn off for your partner. Men’s preferences in fellatio may vary widely, such as preferring gentle or firm pressure, focusing stimulation on the head or base, creating a firm vacuum by sucking, or flicking your tongue. Communicating with him is essential if you want to know what he enjoys. You can also gauge by his reactions, including his body language (thrusting of his hips is a good sign) or verbal (“mmm” or grunts of enjoyment).  

Let him know you’re enjoying it
If you’re attempting your first blowjob, the golden rule is enthusiasm because there’s nothing more off-putting than a reluctant and begrudging fellator. Guys love enthusiasm. It’s sexy and it makes them feel desired. To relieve any pressure you may feel to be an instant oral expert, consider the school of thought that there’s no such thing as a bad blowjob. And as with most activities, with practice (and feedback from him) you can learn how to do a great job.   

Keep your teeth to yourself
The second golden rule – unless you’re an expert – is to cover your teeth with your lips so they don’t hurt him. You want to love him, not graze him. There’s no need to pull your lips so tight over your teeth that you look like you’ve taken your dentures out, though! If you keep your lips in a soft, gentle circle around the shaft of his penis, this should stop your teeth from nicking him.

Don’t rush straight for the dessert
Thirdly, start slowly and tease him, building up to a crescendo that he won’t forget. Kiss him intimately. Breathe hot air on him. Lick in light, teasing circles as if using a paint brush all around the area, from his inner thighs to his testicles, up the shaft of his penis, over the head and swirl around the frenulum. Then tease him further by moving your attention to another part of his body for a while – nibble his nipples, kiss his mouth, dart a tongue into his belly button on your journey back.

Wet and slippery
The next rule is to keep it wet. Generate lots of saliva (if you need help, keep some ice in a glass nearby, plus hot tea for alternating hot/cold sensations) and don’t be shy to dribble it. Or pop a minty sweet in your mouth for a great taste, especially if you’re concerned about his taste, and for a stimulating sensation for him.

Photo: Peter / Creative Commons

Adding food for taste If you drizzle delicious substances over his penis, like honey, strawberries and cream or chocolate, make sure you wash it off thoroughly before having anal or vaginal intercourse to avoid any potential infections. Anything containing sugar may cause a yeast infection when it comes into contact with the vagina.

Where he is most sensitive
Obviously, not all guys feel sensations the same way so it’s best to ask, but generally speaking, the glans (head of the penis) is the most sensitive part of the penis, together with the coronal ridge around the base of the head and the seam that runs down the shaft on the underside. The actual shaft is not particularly sensitive, so licking it at length is a bit pointless.  

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